five-second theater: the long-promised song lyrics!
Welcome to the latest installment of five-second theater, where I provide the first line, and you provide the dialogue.

The rules, to recap, are:

1) I provide a line from a play, a movie, a song lyric, or from somewhere else in life.
2) You create compelling drama in four lines of dialogue or less. Stage direction and scene-setting is encouraged.
3) Deadline is 7 p.m. Pacific Time Friday.

This week's line is from that really whiny remake of Drift Awaythat really annoying song from the 70s or 80s or whenever. As far as I'm concerned that song has always existed and its sappy romanticism, which just invites overemoting by excitable singers, has always annoyed me.

The new version all over the radio apparently is by some band called Uncle Kracker, with the blessing of the original singer Dobie Gray. And it ain't any cooler. Whenever I hear it, I think of a dude in a muscle shirt and cowboy hat at a karaoke bar, whose other karaoke song would be that "old-black-water-dixieland" song.

I realize not everyone has such a violent reaction to "Drift Away." So here is the challenge. Respond to the annoying singer. Or redeem him. You won't win just because you slap him down. But I'm not saying I won't laugh.

EMO GUY: Day after day I'm more confused and I look for the light through the pouring rain.

That represents the part of the song where I usually turn the radio off. Feel free to change the name of the lead character. Good luck.