five-second theater
OK, I know all you folks have been waiting for our next installment of five-second theater. Last time, I didn't properly thank Lily for breaking the ice. Now I think we might get a good turnout.
By suggestion, the rules are ever-so-slightly different from last week, so here they are:

1) I provide a line from a play, a movie, a song lyric, or from somewhere else in life.
2) You create compelling drama in four lines of dialogue or less. Stage direction and scene-setting is encouraged.
3) Deadline is 7 p.m. Pacific Time Friday. (This is longer than before.)

This week, we have a quote that I think is from Dorothy Parker, written on my editor's desk. I don't know why Dorothy Parker would say such a thing, or if it was from a book or a short story of hers, or whatever. I liked it because it screams for an answer, and because another reporter originally mistook it for Shakespeare.

PERSON: What fresh hell is this?

And, if you know where this came from, you can tell me. I'll be grateful, but I can't give you extra points for five-second theater. Rules is rules.